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Summary
Are you struggling to speak up to your boss due to fear of conflict? Our brains are wired to avoid confrontations, especially with authority figures, which can lead to misalignment, frustration, and missed opportunities. In this session, Joshua Graves, author of We Need To Talk: A Survival Guide for Tough Conversations, will help you reframe conflict as a strategic conversation rather than a risky confrontation. By understanding what you can control, influence, and how to communicate effectively, you'll gain practical tools to navigate these conversations with confidence. Through a mix of insights, real-world examples, and interactive exercises, you'll develop a clearer strategy for tackling tough conversations and reduce your fear of speaking up. Tune in to learn how to turn challenging discussions into opportunities for growth and influence.
Key Insights
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Difficult conversations often stem from fear of negative outcomes and power imbalances.
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Understanding the brain's emotional responses can help navigate hard discussions.
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It's vital to identify what aspects of a conversation you can control versus what you can only influence.
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Approaching conversations with psychological safety in mind fosters better communication.
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Using factual observations rather than emotional assumptions can lead to more productive dialogue.
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Highlighting common goals can help mediate conflict between parties with opposing views.
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Personalizing conversations helps humanize interactions and promotes empathy.
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Self-awareness about one’s emotions is crucial before entering challenging conversations.
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Depersonalizing issues can help in discussing contentious points more effectively.
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It may be necessary to step back from an unresolvable situation after exhausting all options.
Notable Quotes
"This book means a lot to me. It took me several years to put together."
"Our brains really like to set us up to avoid these things."
"Understanding what you can control gives you more power and agency."
"Every conversation has specific parts to it."
"You should know what your limits are when it comes to influence."
"Highlighting commonalities can be really helpful in mediation."
"There’s a cost to avoidance; sometimes it’s better to face the discomfort directly."
"Just giving things a little air can help de-escalate a situation."
"Emotions like anger are normal and can be framed in constructive ways."
"Asking 'what' and 'how' can help engage logical thinking in stressful conversations."
















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