Opener: The Other L Word
Summary
Lonely workers are twice as likely to quit their jobs and around 60 percent of Americans report feeling lonely on a regular basis. When people suffer, so does the bottom line. At the average national voluntary turnover rate of 25 percent, a company of 100 people with an average salary of $50,000 will spend between $625,000 and $2.5 million dollars on staff replacement costs in one year.
Well-connected teams that have a high amount of belonging and inclusion experience greater productivity, improved decision-making, lower expenses and a more efficient and happy workforce. In this talk, Sr. UX Designer and Connection Coach Kat Vellos will share insights from her book We Should Get Together and highlights why its lessons matter for DesignOps more than ever before.
Key Insights
-
•
Workplace loneliness directly costs the US economy one trillion dollars annually due to voluntary employee turnover.
-
•
Half of Americans regularly experience loneliness, and the workplace is often the primary place they hope to form meaningful connections.
-
•
Design team culture and interaction habits can silently contribute to loneliness by undermining psychological safety and trust.
-
•
Loneliness impacts workers of all demographics equally, disproving the myth that it only affects marginalized or junior people.
-
•
Employees with close friendships at work show 35% higher commitment to quality and 50% lower turnover risk.
-
•
Psychological safety—where people can be authentic without fear—is foundational to reducing loneliness.
-
•
Perfectionism in design culture exacerbates stress and loneliness, especially for designers of color facing unrealistic cultural ideals.
-
•
Ageism is rampant in tech and design, cutting off access to mentorship and role models, making long term career success feel impossible.
-
•
Authentic connection beats forced fun for fostering belonging; mandatory social events often alienate rather than unite.
-
•
Rewarding courage and candor in workplace communication creates safer environments and reduces turnover by allowing honest dialogue.
Notable Quotes
"A trillion dollars is enough to buy a million dollar home for a million people, and last year, voluntary employee turnover cost the US economy one trillion dollars."
"Not everything that is faced can be changed, but nothing can be changed until it is faced – James Baldwin."
"Lonely workers think about quitting their job twice as frequently as non-lonely workers."
"One in five people say they deal with feelings of disconnection and loneliness in the workplace."
"There’s nothing more important for safety and group culture than psychological safety."
"Trying to be perfect is exhausting. We don’t have to live this way."
"If a person has a human moment that’s grounds for dismissal, it ends up muting my personality."
"Employees that have a work best friend have a 50% drop in turnover risk and are 300% more likely to say they love their companies."
"Reward courage and candor, not assimilation."
"Personal resiliency is no match for environmental toxicity."
Or choose a question:
More Videos
"His sigh was just a sigh. It was not a signal of any defect or usability issue to solve."
Susan Simon-DanielsWar Stories LIVE! Susan Simon-Daniels
March 30, 2020
"Printing is not sexy but it is absolutely vital."
Sharon BautistaTime to Make the Donuts: How User Research Helped Bridge Disparate Teams
January 8, 2024
"When I see users saying, oh my goodness, I didn’t know it did that, that’s a clear sign of too much complexity."
David Cronin Uday Gajendar Peter Morville Kendra ShimmellDiscussion
May 13, 2015
"We need to stop centering ourselves in research and start fighting to pay participants, ensure representation, and use real data."
Jemma Ahmed Megan Blocker Eduardo OrtizRedefining the research toolkit: Expanding methodologies for a changing world
March 12, 2025
"Collaboration during COVID was successful using tools like Miro to do remote whiteboarding and brainstorming across time zones."
George Hinchliffe Joy LiuDelivering Amazing Experiences
June 10, 2021
"What one government agency does often serves as the playbook for success at another."
Stefanie OwensOptimizing for Outcomes: Transformation Design in Systems at Scale
December 4, 2024
"Cultural shifts to experience-driven companies are less about creating new teams and more about creating a collective movement everyone owns."
Steve Baty Richard Dalton Maria Giudice Harry MaxDiscussion
June 9, 2016
"It took me just a little bit amount of time to get into that and actually make a proper component from Figma."
Ryan Matthew Alex KurchevBridging Design and Code: AI-Powered Design System Integration
September 11, 2025
"Everyone contributes to conflict; it’s not about right or wrong, but what each person is trying to protect."
Laura WeissTurn Down the Heat: 3 Ways to Handle Conflict in the Moment
November 20, 2024