Log in or create a free Rosenverse account to watch this video.
Log in Create free account100s of community videos are available to free members. Conference talks are generally available to Gold members.
Summary
Have you ever faced work requests that seem impossible, frustrating, or just plain absurd? Whether they stem from intentional boundary-pushing or a lack of understanding, these demands can put you in a tough spot. In this session, Joshua Graves, author of We Need To Talk: A Survival Guide for Tough Conversations will explore practical strategies for handling ludicrous requests with a level head. You'll learn how to uncover the motivations behind these requests, assess their impact, and respond in a way that maintains your influence and work-life balance. Through techniques like stakeholder mapping, reframing conversations, and negotiation tactics, you'll discover how to effectively push back on unrealistic demands and strategically accept requests when necessary. Join us for real-world insights and actionable tools to manage these challenging situations with confidence.
Key Insights
-
•
Ludicrous requests often arise from pressure or misunderstanding rather than ill intent.
-
•
The Conversation Pyramid is a flexible framework to structure tough conversations starting from self-checks to shared understanding.
-
•
Anchoring techniques like presenting partial facts or extreme deadlines are common manipulation tactics in requests.
-
•
Psychological safety underpins productive dialogue and helps prevent defensive reactions.
-
•
Asking questions starting with what and how engages logical thinking and reduces defensiveness better than why-questions.
-
•
Stakeholder mapping reveals hidden motivations and helps align conflicting goals strategically.
-
•
Language gaps across disciplines cause many communication failures; banning jargon like 'MVP' can increase clarity.
-
•
Not speaking up about unrealistic requests risks project failure and damages trust.
-
•
Requests from upper management often get distorted as they cascade down, making direct conversations difficult.
-
•
Frequent communication and strong relationships prevent unintentionally passing on unreasonable requests.
Notable Quotes
"Stop writing so much email and do real work."
"They wouldn’t tell us what the requirements were; it was our job to figure it out."
"Progress and innovation happen when you create unrealistic goals, but it goes too far when it's impossible."
"You want to check your motivations and your understanding of the situation before any conversation."
"Psychological safety is key—if folks aren't in the right state, the conversation isn't productive."
"How am I supposed to do that? is a good question to reflect impracticality without defensive triggers."
"Stakeholder mapping helps you see who needs what and align your tactics accordingly."
"If you don't speak up about ludicrous requests, someone will ask why you didn’t say anything."
"Language is imprecise; banning crutch words like MVP forces people to clarify real meaning."
"Every group has their own vocabulary that signals belonging, but jargon can become a barrier to understanding."
Dig deeper—ask the Rosenbot:
More Videos
"The design is how you show up in response to probing the system day in, day out."
John Mortimer Milan Guenther Lucy Ellis Patrick QuattlebaumPanel Discussion
December 3, 2024
"If growth board content overlaps with quarterly business reviews, don’t do both; instead, inject an outcome mindset into existing meetings."
Kit Unger Jackie Ho Veevi Rosenstein Vasileios XanthopoulosTheme 2: Discussion
January 8, 2024
"Give three pieces of evidence for every piece of feedback you provide an individual."
Theresa Slate Erin RobertsonWhy Changing Hearts & Minds Doesn’t Work When Promoting DE&I Efforts, but Checklists Do
October 4, 2023
"Redemptive design means to buy back or restore something or someone to its rightful place."
Liz EbengoThe Burden on Children: The Cost of Insufficient Post-Conflict Services and Pathways Forward
December 4, 2024
"Progress and innovation happen when you create unrealistic goals, but it goes too far when it's impossible."
Joshua GravesWe Need To Talk: Managing Ludicrous Requests at Work (Part 3 of 3)
May 12, 2025
"Requesting glossy portfolios up front risks excluding candidates with strong problem-solving skills who may not have had opportunities to showcase visual design."
Anna Avrekh Amy Jiménez Márquez Morgan C. Ramsey Catarina TsangDiversity In and For Design: Building Conscious Diversity in Design and Research
June 9, 2021
"Knowing your boundaries and skills lets you focus influence into meaningful outcomes rather than spreading too thin."
Bria Alexander Meredith Black Tim GilliganState of DesignOps Panel
October 1, 2021
"We are not collecting vanity analytics, the data is doing real work on informing design."
Mackenzie Cockram Sara Branco Cunha Ian FranklinIntegrating Qualitative and Quantitative Research from Discovery to Live
December 16, 2022
"Balancing risk and confidence helps teams move at the right speed for the right decisions."
Sean McKayCoexisting with non-researchers: Practical strategies for a democratized research future
March 11, 2025
